BROKEN TRUST RECORD

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I recently came across an article on the lifestyle section of a mainstream newspaper that encouraged women to spy on their future husbands before declaring their vows. The disturbing bit of all this is the disrespect modernisation has lured in, disguised as evolution. Spy on your fiance? My grandmother would turn in her grave if she ever heard of such a proposal. Yes, trust needs to be bridged on so many levels. Relationships, both professional and romantic are suffering. However, when did prying into another’s life secure any relationship? In fact, I believe it turns you into an all-time loony.

I do not condone any sort of lie, whether a white lie or otherwise. However, it is my belief that relationships are built on trust. Maybe it’s my naivety barring me from getting the bigger picture but why stay with someone you don’t trust? Take a professional relationship for instance. If a customer is sceptic of a certain product or service, they opt for another alternative. So why not do the same? If you are 50/50 about your partner then find another one. I know that it’s easier said than done, but will you be snooping on your ‘babe’ all your life?

Besides, some people go overboard and intentions shift. You might have initially being spying because you suspected they were keeping another ‘honey’ warm, but then it goes too far when you use that as an anchor to feel secure about your relationship or reason to bring up  random fights. There is nothing as unattractive as an insecure partner. They will always be hovering around you and in the end suffocation could terminate the relationship.

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This is why trust seems to be dwindling. No one takes time to build a friendship which would eventually grow into a relationship anymore. Everyone is in a rush to be committed. By nature, humans are needy creatures; no man is an island. But what’s the rush? Take your time, study someone- their good and bad habits-engage in family history to be sure that no random lineage curses linger on. Spying will never secure a happy home. It only keeps your mind grinding on possible affairs that are non-existent costing you a relationship.

I empathize with the broken hearts that have vowed to never trust another. But in all fairness, not everyone is the same. It’s a tale we’ve heard too many times but truth be told, we are bound to meet cruel beings that are out to use and abuse tender hearts. Then comes along the angels sent to bless and heal the scrapped ones. What happens when they meet a hostile situation, a past lover’s mistake? Why does he/she have to be the one to pay?

If you can’t trust them, then you don’t love them. It’s that simple. 

BAD HABITS DIE HARD

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When I scroll down social media pages and land on a feature article stipulating struggles of the girl child, I cannot help but pause and scheme through the article. The story I came across in particular presented a unique angle, in that, the young women of Mandera county are not only compelled to deliver while at home, but are shunned by the family when they fail to. it beats logic why we are purposing to evolve yet we ignore such impediments clogging our development graph.

Over the weekend, I made a new friends, Halima (not her real name). On realising that she was  a product of Mandera county, I engaged my interrogative mode. She was quite open about her upbringing, where waking up at 5am to trek in search for water had become a routine. This would prick her, especially because her brothers were beinn educated as the women received informal education from the older women. Truly at times some traditions are retrogressive. The family never saw the essence of empowering the women due to punitive fears of being dictated by them.

 

Halima proceeded to narrate a sad ordeal of how she witnessed her cousin, Fatma, bleed to death while undergoing delivery. Her father was reluctant to take her to a hospital, despite the stifling fact that it was barely a 20 minute walk from their home. After struggling while in labour, due to excessive pain, Fatma gave up the fight. Halima succumbed to depression as she was quite close to Ftma, often seeing her as her blood sister. Following Fatma's death, Halima found herself loathing the customs she once honored.

Finally, Halima's father gave in and sent her off to her aunt's place in Nairobi, where he hoped that his daughter would recover from the rattling ordeal and get back to her senses. Thank goodness for evolving regions which paved way for Halima's road to education. Her aunt, a primary school teacher, often rescued other girls from harsh customs that often oppressed them, and put them through school. Lady luck found Halima as she was educated until college where she studied law, and is not back to her home town, advocating for abolishment of decaying customs.

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CUT THE CORD, STOP SUBSTANCE ABUSE

So, I hope these figures will shock the rest of you as I was. I get how substance abuse is on the rise but it's baffling to have a median age of drugs and alcohol related cases beginning from the young age of 10. My challenge today is to enlighten the drug users what they are getting themselves into. This is not to guilt-trip anyone, just adding to the pool of knowledge, I guess.

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First of all, the fact that male tobacco smokers have a low sperm count is a red light. Yo, I want my generation to procreate and fill the whole earth as it was always intended, but that could impede population growth in the next twenty years. Oh wait, but for those who prefer going bald, then keep smoking until hair loss hits you, hard.

My blood boils at a high temperature of are you frigging kidding me when I am smacked with the, ' ... on average, smokers lose 15 years of life and kills 1,200 people a day...', do you care to know fact! Ayayayaya, can we get serious about our health, please. Are you aware that more people die from smoking than from AIDS, car accidents, suicide, murder and fires? And if you did are informed, why are you ignorant of the fact that four out of five lung cancers are caused by smoking?

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Now, on to the 7million Kenyan polite alcoholics. Society pleads your case every single time, urging us to relay empathy for your unfortunate downward spiral. Let's just be honest, no one really shoves the drink down your throat. The only sympathy you are getting from me is the truth. Keep on tasting that liquor at every first, 'it has been a while...'instance. Just don't forget that excessive alcohol can suppress some body functions and, in extreme cases result in death. Now, how excessive is excessive? Hmmmh, have the dark circles began forming round your eyes, yet? Don't forget that ant aging cream cannot save you from premature aging. The next time you crave that high feeling, please don't forget that psychosis is as real as sunrise.

Not all sinking ships can be salvaged. Be informed of the consequences of the decisions you make.

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